Sound Off; Natural Hair In The Workplace - Is Corporate America Ready To Accept All Forms Of Diversity?

Latrice with her curly wig << >> Latrice with her natural hair

Corporate America has already embraced our African American sisters with pressed hair, weaves and relaxers; but what about the women that don natural hair styles? It is often said that they are overlooked for promotions, skipped over during interviews and even worse; told to change their hair into more "professional" styles.

@TriceDiva sent me a tweet and said:

I wore a wig inspired by u to work [outre quick weave evony] & was told it wasn't professional...can you give your thoughts about natural hair in the workplace? I work in sales at an hotel that deems itself as conservative..they said it was too long and against the rules.

Here are my thoughts on natural hair in the workplace: 

How can the texture of your hair determine your level of professionalism? Highly textured hair is a genetic trait, and should not be treated as a fashion or political statement. In my opinion this is similar to implying that natural red hair is unprofessional or frowning upon those with natural blue eyes in the workplace [as these are all genetic traits as well]. How can we pick and choose what traits are deemed professional? And more importantly, why are we always on the receiving end of said bias?

Having worn my natural hair in certain corporate settings, I have had to answer in-depth questions about my political and cultural beliefs or be subjected to off-kilter commentary about my kinks and coils. To be quite frank, it is annoying. No one seems to express interest in my choice of music or political affiliation when my hair is bone straight or perfectly coiffed into silky, flowing locks.

Believe me, I get the ideology around it. A neat, tidy appearance breeds credibility and goes hand-in-hand with professionalism. But there is a fine line between protecting the identity of a brand and discriminating against those who don't meet society's expectations of beauty. Is Corporate America so out of touch that they can't respect the diversity of African American women? Why are styles like braids, locs and afro's looked at as unprofessional? Furthermore, what other ethnic group has to go to great lengths to "hide" and "tame" certain aspects of their genetic makeup to appear more "professional" and "neat"? 

While there have been great strides taken to diversify the workplace, there is still a primitive form of thinking that silently [and in this case not-so-silently] governs with a rod of iron. Those thoughts stem from 100 year-old beliefs that our hair in it's natural state appears dirty, un-kept and undesirable. - Let me make this clear that this isn't a black vs white issue, but a societal issue that is pressing a certain "standard of professionalism" by implying that the culturally significant hairstyles of one ethnic group [usually the minority] is unprofessional. As a result this ethnic group has to conform by choosing styles that are labeled "professional" by the self-serving ruling majority. These professional styles usually require heat or chemicals to straighten our hair therefore mirroring those same tired images perpetuated by Western culture. 

The bottom line:
Natural hair definitely has it's place in the workplace.

How do you feel about natural hair in the workplace? Do you think it is professional? I am interested in hearing other opinions on this [even if you disagree!] Has anyone out there experienced discrimination or snark comments about your hair? How long did it take before you were comfortable wearing your hair in natural styles?

For those that are pro wearing natural hair styles in the workplace I am sponsoring a giveaway just for you. Send in your best pic [nikole@themoptopmaven.com] of you rocking a natural style in the workplace, and you will be eligible to receive a $50 gift certificate to Curl Mart. Curly wigs, curly weaves, locs, braids, twa's, braid outs, twist outs, two strand twists and the likes are all accepted. The pics will be posted in an album on The Moptop Maven Facebook page, and select photos will be showcased on this site. The goal is to give others the courage to wear natural styles in the workplace whilst promoting respect for cultural diversity. - This contest will run until November 15th, 2010 11:59 PST.

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Reclaim That Positive Energy Pt 2 - Bring Light & Balance Into Your Life!

 [source]

Good Afternoon Dream Chasers! - As promised, here is the second installment on how to reclaim that positive energy! If you haven't checked out Part 1, you may do so here. Because of the length of this post, I have also decided to do a 3rd installment later on this week, which will focus more on productivity.

As you make your way down the path to energetic balance, you will start to realize the importance of maintaining a positive energy field around you. Look at the people in your life at this very moment. Are they adding to your life in a positive manner, or damaging to your self esteem, and invalidating you as a person? Friendships/relationships can either be warm and nurturing, or energetically draining.

Any relationship [whether platonic or sexual in nature] that isn't conducive to growth and positivity should be released at once. Instead, choose a path of self-healing, conscious joy, and renewal. You will find that as you do this, you will populate your life with more people along the same astral plane, and your relationships will surely be more meaningful, as you will attract healing and harmonious energies.

Cleaning house has definitely been one of the best decisions I have ever made. When I starting house-cleaning a few months ago, my house got empty pretty fast. However it was also more quiet and harmonious. 

How To Break Away From Toxic Relationships:

You must first identify the relationships. Make a list of all of the individuals in your life, and line by line, name by name ask yourself the following questions:

1. Am I holding on to this relationship because I am used to this person? Is this a co-dependent relationship?
2. Can I trust this person with my innermost thoughts? Are they reliable?
3. Do I like the person I become when I am with them? Do I feel like I can be myself?
4. Is the relationship 50/50? Am I receiving the same as I give?
5. Have I done everything necessary to salvage the relationship.

Also be prepared to let go emotionally! Sometimes this can be the hardest part; as feelings of remorse and guilt has a tendency to draw us back into the toxic relationship. Understand that moving on and completely letting go is a process, so find solace in knowing that letting go of toxic energies is one of the healthiest decisions you can make along your path of enlightenment. Will there be a void there? Most certainly, so fill that void with meaningful activities, and/or individuals that exude joy, love and positivity.

Once you have deemed it necessary to let go of the relationship, you need to follow your inner guidance system to determine the best method of letting go. Here are a few methods:

Refrain From Burning Bridges by Making A Gradual Organic Transition:

Opt for short text message/email exchanges in lieu of long phone conversations
Do not initiate contact
Wait a day or so prior to responding to emails/texts
Control your personal availability to others. When they ask you to hang out, express that you are busy. Stand your ground, and tell them you will let them know when you are available.

The above methods are more of a "letting them down easy" approach, in hopes that they get the message. For relationships that are a bit more serious/complicated, a face to face conversation should occur.

Face To Face:  

Have an honest, non-confrontational conversation with this person about why you want to create a healthy distance.

Beware:

Beware of manipulators that may try to use old wounds to gain power and favor over you.
Beware of people with low self worth that will be-friend you because you give them a sense of security and validation.

How To Reclaim That Positive Energy - Part 1

[source]

When our energy isn't aligned, we are in a constant state of inner conflict. It takes work, a lot of persistence and re-wiring to stop the barrage of negative thoughts that enters our psyche on a daily basis. I get questions from readers on how to stay positive especially during trying times in their lives, so I thought I would do a post on it.

Reclaiming your positivity is going to take a bit of multitasking on your part, as you will need to simultaneously change your outer world, while also working on your inner world.

To keep this from being wordier than it already is, I am going to break it up into two parts; This first installment is going to focus on your thought process, and de-cluttering your life, while the second will delve into relationships, and boosting your productivity.

Your outer world is a reflection of your inner world - What does your outer world say about you?

Part 1
Thought Processes  

Organization

Part 2

Relationships

Friendships

Productivity

 Lift your vibration by thinking positive and creating a positive energy field.

Did you know that you create your life experiences by the balance of your thoughts? Happiness, attracts happiness, and negativity attracts negativity. What is the likely-hood that your friend who is always male bashing [men aint sh*t] will fall madly in love and get married? - You must put yourself on a higher vibrational level in order to manifest the things you truly desire.

Understand that with every good deed, every good thought, and every good emotion, you are lifting your vibration, and creating a positive energy field that will reveal a new fulfilling life for you. 

Change the negative thoughts that are the most dominant first! 

As these are usually the thoughts that govern your day-to-day activities. [Some examples: being afraid of change, worrying about what others think, defeatist attitudes]

Take a sheet of paper and draw a line down the center of the paper. On one side write down all of your doubts, on the other, write down all the reasons your doubts are invalid. These will become your positive affirmations, you must return to these affirmations whenever your begin to feel doubts about your plan in life.

Here are some ways to replace more specific negative thoughts:

-If you are afraid of change, ask yourself what small step you can make TODAY that will get you closer to the bigger picture.
-If you have a defeatist attitude, you must gain trust back in yourself by following through on goals. Set 4 attainable goals daily, and slowly but surely as you work to focus on follow-through, the trust you lost in yourself will re-emerge.
-If someone close to you shoots down your dream, stop assisting them by participating in negative mental chatter. Negative mental chatter includes; self doubt, reflecting on what made them shoot down your dream etc. Instead, choose to focus on your positive affirmations.

Start a gratitude journal

When you realize how truly blessed you are, you will begin to feel happier each day. These don't have to be eloquent journal entries, simply list the things that you are grateful for each day.

 Control irrational thoughts that lead you to make rash decisions 

If you are having a "moment" take some time to get yourself in healthy state of mind. Never make decisions when you are overcome with emotion, as those tend to be the moments you are looking for instant gratification.
-If possible, give yourself at least 12 hours to reflect on the issue at hand, and make a decision only when you are detached from controlling the outcome.

Spend quiet time alone in one of your favorite places

You can relax, meditate, walk, run, or sit still. I recommend being still. I like to meditate near Runyon Canyon during sunset, it brings about about a sense of rejuvenation, and mental clarity. I mediate at least once daily to purge any discomforts/dissatisfaction. 

Once you are in a positive state of mind, it's time to DE-clutter!

De-clutter! [Workspace]

You will feel a lot better when your workspace is in order, having an organized, clutter-free workspace is conducive to healthy work habits. Try this: Remove everything on your workspace except for the things you absolutely need for (1) month, and see how well you do. Sometimes we don't realize that the things we put in/near/around our workspace to make us feel comfortable, can actually activate the "procrastination gene".

De-clutter! [Home]

Instead of cringing at the overwhelming thought of de-cluttering your house in one round, spend 15 minutes a day organizing, and de-cluttering.

For every new item you bring into your home, you must donate/toss two. 

Place all of the things you "think" you will need at some point in a box, and write a date on it [set the date for a year in the future] if by that time, you haven't utilized the contents of that box, it's time to donate/toss it.

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Creating The Blueprint For Your Dynamic Future!

 I went to one of my favorite cafe's for Crepe's and a self assessment! Crave Cafe on Ventura Blvd is open 24 hours, and provides free Wifi!

Good Morning Dream Chasers! 

Tell me; What is your divine blueprint? What were you put on this earth to do? What comes naturally to you? What is the one thing you feel you must accomplish before you leave this earth?

Now tell me; What work have you done today towards building the foundation of your future? Are you satisfied with the level of effort thus far?

Every four months, I do a self evaluation to determine how well I have stayed true to my vision. I also take the time re-evaluate priorities, re-visit my purpose, and if needed re-work my blueprint. The keys to your future are in part determined by your ability to make a clear road-map, your ability to execute, and how efficient you are when it comes to executing your goals. I used to think that all movement was forward movement, until I realized one day I was just running around in circles.

I've spent the better part of 10 years trying to figure out my life guys, learn from my mistakes and implement some of these tips today!
 
Lets start with the basics:
For these exercises you will need to grab a sheet of paper, and go to a quiet, or comfortable inviting space.  
PURPOSE
To help find your purpose, answer these questions:
1. What are you most passionate about?

2. What activities do you find the most joy in?

3. What is the one thing you feel you couldn't live without doing?

4. Who are your inspirations, and why?

5. What skills are people constantly complimenting you on?

6. What goals in your life are the most meaningful?

7. What do you want to be remembered for?
8. What comes exceptionally easy for you?

Once you have answered these questions, try to find the "common denominators". Do you see any patterns/similarities? Is there a recurring theme? These patterns/similarities are an indicator of your purpose in life. If you are still having issues; try to focus your quest on uncovering your raw, natural abilities, things that come innate to you.

GOALS
Set your goals using the S.M.A.R.T method:
S: Stands for specific; you must be as specific as possible when writing down your list of goals. Focus on why you want to do it, how you want to do it, and when you want to do it.

M: Stands for measurable; you need to find a way to keep track of your goals so that you are able to make any necessary changes to your plans along the way. There needs to be "mini-goals" built in your main goal so that you are able to note milestones, and progress.

A: Stands for attainable; make sure the goal set is truly important to you; whenever a goal is important to you, you remain motivated, and you are able to think of workarounds to bypass potential problems.

R: Stands for realistic; make sure your goals are within reach. However don't confuse setting realistic goals with lowering your expectations. Setting realistic goals helps fuel the momentum and keep the excitement going as you move through your list. Make sure you have all the tools/skills/resources available to achieve your goals, as you are more likely to work hard to achieve them.

T: Stands for time based; make sure to set specific dates for completion of your goals, if specific time frames aren't set, you may feel like you can start at any time.

BE-DO-HAVE
Once you have figured out your purpose, and written down your goals; it's time to practice the BE - DO - HAVE Paradigm. Are you are a Human Doing or a Human Being?

Simply put, you need to BE in harmony first. That is your state of being. I always say that acting in love manifests an abundance of blessings.

Once you've mastered the art of "being" you need to actually DO some work prior to HAVING the true fulfillment you desire!

Human Doings = constantly in a state of "doing/action" which leads to never being satisfied or fulfilled. 
Human Beings = learn to let their state of "being" govern their actions. Being isn't about forcing results, being IS about letting things evolve organically. When you learn to BE, you will notice that you will act in harmony with your true spirit vs being fueled by the need to see "results".

Life Is Partly What We Make It, And Partly What It Is Made By The Friends We Choose - Tennessee Williams

Lo and I managed to catch tickets last minute to check out Foreign Exchange at The Roxy last night, and it was definitely good times! It was a much needed break from the monotony we have been experiencing lately, and it felt amazing to just let our hair down and dance to one of our fav groups. There is nothing better than great live music!

Now more than ever I value the phrase "true friend" - Ever notice that when you make the conscious decision backed with the effort to start LIVING your life; certain friends start to reveal themselves? When I was the insecure Nikole who was confused about her direction, and could barely look people in the eye, I was the ultimate sidekick, the bestie, the BFF. Now that I strive to walk in truth, and have made the decision to get out of my own way, I have found that I have become less appealing to some. At first it stung, as I wanted the unwavering support that I gave others. Then I started to realize that in order for true growth to occur, I must begin to get my house in order, and clean up my surroundings. I now know and have accepted the fact that it is ok to move on; it is ok to organically transition out of a situation that isn't conducive to a healthy lifestyle. Jealousy, greed, and competition are not the components of a healthy friendship.

Once I made the decision to transition out of those unhealthy relationships and interact with those on a much higher vibration, I started to feel much better about myself and about my outlook on my future. It seems as though when you plant yourself in love and support, the universe conspires to send blessings your way, and it manifests into an abundance of joy and wealth. Nothing can be denied to you, if you surround yourself in love.

Wearing:
Top: 25cent Goodwill Top
Pants: Zara
All Jewelry: Forever 21
Watch: Michael Kors

Sound Off: The Delicate Dance Between Categorizing & Segregation

What on earth is good hair and why are we still using that term in the 21rst century?! I was in the Beauty Supply recently and a woman approached me, struck up a conversation, and we began to talk hair. I don't remember much after; "have you always had good hair, or was it your regimen".  

While this may very well be an innocent question, the motives behind the question leads me to believe there is more that can be done in the natural hair community to make ALL women feel beautiful about their crown and glory. My biggest issue stems not from the question, but from the attitude in which the question was cultivated. One of the main reasons I despise hair typing is because I feel in certain ways it contributes to the growing disconnect amongst African American women. Women with more of a kinkier hair type have been made to feel inferior about their hair since slavery; here we are another hundred years later and we are still using titles like good and bad hair; this time out of our own mouths, and in our own communities. 

Why is it that some of us feel the need to neatly categorize "our people"? If you happen to see a dark-skinned girl and she has long, silky, curly hair; do you immediately try to figure out her nationality? Or do you just admire her tresses? - There are some that will not rest until they know "to whom you belong", and will go as far as to ask the person their nationality. Is it sheer coincidence that some of us still apply the same methods of classification that were used to enslave us?

While I understand the need to help people understand and take better care of their hair, hair typing excludes so many others [like myself] who don't fit neatly into the system. It is that feeling of disconnect that can lead to discouragement, and a yearning for something other than what you have. I remember being afraid to go natural because I felt my hair wasn't silky enough to wear it in it's natural state, I hardly ever saw people raving about hair that was my texture. Quite the contrary; Tracee Ellis Ross was the poster child for the "perfect curls". What did that mean for me? Did that mean I was less desirable? For a moment I felt I was. I had to go off the grid to find myself, and I did it free of class systems, charts and graphs. 


Do any of you have issues with the phrase "Good Hair"? - What is considered "good hair" to you? - Is there anyone out that has issues with the hair typing system? - Do you feel it has helped you at all with your hair journey? I am curious to hear your thoughts on this...

Many People Decide They Want To Be Millionaires When Really They Want The Experiences That Being A Millionaire Affords, Which More Often Than Not Doesn’t Require Anywhere Near A Million Dollars At All.

 snapshots of my workspace

As most of you know, I have a weekly meeting of the minds with my dear friend Lo. The purpose of these meetings is to inspire each other, push each other, and keep each other centered, and focused. This week, I am going to have a meeting of the minds with all of you via this blog post. Today I am going to take you through my "Creative Flow" which is basically culminating an idea, and seeing it through from conception to fruition. I plan on keeping all of you updated on the progress, as well as the set-backs as I try to launch my line.

These past few weeks, I have had the amazing opportunity to work on some commissioned pieces for a few special people, [do to confidentiality issues, I can't disclose much info about it yet] and I couldn't have done it without some of the techniques outlined below. Execution has always been an issue for me, however learning my creative flow has helped put a stop to me being afraid to pull the trigger on a lot of projects.

Executing goals is something I am sure we have all had difficulty with at some time or another, and it is the failure to execute goals that has a tendency to leave our spirits with a certain void. As a result, we sometimes turn to acquiring material possessions, forging relationships whether platonic or sexual in nature, or turning to other vices such as smoking or drinking in hopes to fill this void. Those vices may fill your void, however those feelings of "happiness" are only momentary, and are dependent upon external events which leads to a state of constantly chasing your next hit of happiness. Stop seeking pleasure to avoid pain; in order to completely live up to your God-given name and fill your void with true happiness, you must return to your goals/purpose and begin to cultivate and nurture them/it.

I'm pretty cheesy, I save all of my fortunes from fortune cookies and have them near/on my workspace - Never doubt the power of positive affirmations.

Make room for positive energy, and provide a comfortable, inviting workspace: Prior to working, I light some incense, and create ambient lighting around my workstation. I make sure my workspace is clean and free of clutter. If I am feeling an extreme amount of tension from the days events, I may burn sage near my workspace, and meditate for about 20 minutes.

Make a road map: How are you going to get from "Point A" to "Point B"? I find it is best to work out the schematics of this equation prior to starting the creative process.

• Write down your list of goals

• Take big goals and chop them up into smaller pieces; if Public Relations is not in your budget right now, find other ways to get press/recognition for your brand. Many designers in this day and age resort to "gifting" celebrities with their creations in hopes of garnering press, and/or securing a relationship with their stylist. You can do this by interacting with the stylists on social networking sites [twitter is a good tool] and asking them for their mailing address, or you can contact the agency that represents the stylist and request that info from them. A lot of the popular designers you see now have befriended a stylist or two. 
• Make sure you include your target market in your road map, this will determine the look and feel of your brand, as well as the type of press to seek. 

Brainstorm: I like to read old history books for inspiration, cut out pictures from magazines, visit Museums, or even listen to music from my personal favorite Miles Davis with a pen and pad in hand, writing down the first thought that comes time mind.- Below you will find the inspiration from my jewelry collection, and as you can see, you can acquire a "source" for inspiration from anywhere.

I am inspired by the organic shapes in most of Lawrence Kupferman's pieces. [Image Credit]

I am also inspired by my studies of The Chakras [Image Credit]

Inspiration is also drawn from the Fela Kuti Queens [Image Credit]

Organization: Once you have completed the task of brainstorming, it is time to organize your thoughts in a cohesive manner so that they translate well. Here's an example:

Inspiration: Lawrence Kupferman, Chakra, Fela Kuti Queens, - Organic shapes, rough gemstones, use of gemstones that promotes positive energy and spiritual healing. Vibrant colors, colors of Africa

Sourcing: Once you have the basic idea/framework on paper, you must begin to source the materials for your project. When sourcing materials, it is best to acquire items that are readily available at all times, try not to purchase "close out" items because there is no guarantee they will be available in the future. In the event your product is in high demand you want to make sure you have access to supplies that will meet the demands of your consumers. 

Cost Analysis: Once you have your supplies sourced, you can begin to set prices for your wares. The prices should include the following: Cost of goods, gas, ink and paper [for your promo materials], your personal pay rate, Public Relations, and any other relevant business related expenses. Your price should also be reflective of your target market.

Set dates, and stick to them: I set dates for everything, it is the only way that I can keep myself on track. For instance; you can give yourself two weeks to seek inspiration, two weeks to complete sourcing of your materials, etc. - Setting dates can keep the momentum going ensuring that you always remain excited and focused on crossing off goals before moving to the next. It also helps create organized work habits in that you are used to a methodical flow versus doing whatever you feel at the moment. While the latter is great, I would reserve that style of work for someone who is very disciplined.

Create a professional business front: Even though you might be conducting business from your living room, your brand does not have to reflect that. If graphic designing isn't your forte put an ad in Craigslist for a graphic designer; or you can even post ads in forums like Project 4 Hire in which freelancers bid for your work. Check out Logo Pond to snag design inspiration, not only is it free to look, but it will also help you determine what "industry standard" is for your particular business venture. You can also turn to sites like Big Cartel which offers merchants an easy platform to sell their wares. Also check out Wix for those DIY'rs out there; they offer flash web design templates for only several dollars a month.

Be Just Who You Are; Make No Apologies!

One of my favorite quotes of all. This is on my bathroom mirror for me to see every morning. I want everyone out there to believe these words, because I truly believe that we are all meant to shine if we just give ourselves the opportunity to do so.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. - Marianne Williamson

-- Marianne Williamson lectures every Tuesday night [7:30PM] in Los Angeles at the Regent Showcase Theatre. Needless to say, I will be there next Tuesday for continued spiritual guidance, and insight. If any of you in the L.A area happen to stop by, make sure to say hello so we can chat for awhile!

More pics of me making the most of my self-timer, tripod, and backdrop. I am working on a 365-day project in which you take a self-portrait every day for one year. I am curious to see how long I can keep this going, and I can't wait to show you all what I do with it!

This is a twist out I did last night using Miss Jessies Curly Buttercreme, surprisingly guys I am quite pleased with the results. I had a 16oz jar in my cabinet that I planned on passing down to anyone willing to take it off my hands, but now I am forced to renege. My hair is very defined, soft, shiny, and big, I was afraid that this wouldn't have much hold because it seems to be marketed as more of a "moisturizing product" however that wasn't the case.

I was completely out of my "staple" hair products last night [w/the exception of Paul Mitchell The Condish], so I used things that I had stashed away. Prior to twisting, I shampooed my hair with Goldwell Kerasilk Shampoo, and conditioned with V05 Moisture Milk Strawberries and Creme for about 45minutes w/o heat. I then used Paul Mitchell The Conditioner as a leave-in, and twisted with the Miss Jessie's Buttercreme. I let the twists air-dry overnight, and separated them until I got the desired fullness.

Make Up
Eyeshadow: Mekong [NARS]
Blush: Taj Mahal [NARS]
Lip Liner: Flesh [Ulta Brand]
Lipstick: Circe [NYX]
Lashes: Red Cherry [102]

To the folks requesting a tut on the make-up look from the last post, I will have it up this week!

Reality Is The Mirror Of Your Thoughts. Choose Well What You Put In Front Of The Mirror.

I received a couple of emails last week asking me how I manage to stay positive. The answer is simple; positive thoughts. Positive thoughts manifests positive actions, in other words what the mind seeks..it will find. Yes I have my moments when it is hard to remain positive. It is at those times that I reach for a book, read positive affirmations, or clear my mind by praying/meditating and asking for clarity.

See No Evil - Hear No Evil - Speak No Evil - One of my favorite phrases, which has the same principle as cause and effect. Putting positive causes out there will have a wonderful impact on your karmatic experience.

Hear No Evil - I tend to shy away from people that have a defeatist attitude, and gravitate to those with more of a positive outlook on life. Try to eliminate your contact with those that are chronically negative, especially those that put others down. If eliminating them out of your life is not an option, enforce very strong boundaries so that they are unable to drain your energy.

Speak No Evil - Eliminate words like "I can't" and "impossible" out of your vocabulary. Using phrases like those will stop you from searching for solutions to your problems. Instead, replace those feelings of doubt with questions such as "how can I" and "what do I need to do to make this possible".
Pay someone a sincere compliment at least once a day, chances are your compliment will make their day a bit brighter, and they will pass that sunshine along to others.

--- Wearing:
Jumpsuit: Thrifted
Name Necklace: Custom
Colorful Beaded Bracelets: H&M
Gold Bangles/Gold Cuff: Forever 21
Tree of Life Necklace: DIY
Eyeshadow: Mekong [Nars]
Lipstick: Lustering [MAC]
Blush: Taj Mahal [NARS]

We Are All Faced With A Series Of Great Opportunities Brilliantly Disguised As Impossible Situations. - Charles R. Swindoll

 The waiter told me to prepare myself for the best hot cocoa ever....he was right!

Lo and I had yet another meeting of the minds last night. This time the meeting commenced at Bricks & Scones, my new favorite Larchmont hang-out. This cafe boasts a beautiful garden setting, free wifi, and a laid back attitude that makes you feel like you can settle in for hours. Not to mention the prices are so low, you don't think twice about asking for seconds.

Part of this meeting was all about letting go of our attachment to "material possessions". We both agreed that it was time to do some material downsizing. I have a tendency to hold on to objects because they make me feel comfortable or secure, however holding on to "things" that no longer have a value in my life seldom satisfies my need for true happiness and fulfillment. It is only when I remove those inanimate objects and replace them with positive, substantial feelings and emotions that I will truly be free.

We are both making a conscious effort to fill our spaces with only the things we need, as this will lead to us having more of a practical relationship with "material possessions" versus being dependent on them.

Love the outside! 

Lo!

Me!

My indulgence for the day, a mini carrot cupcake!

Wearing: Hat: Vintage + Dress: Forever 21 + Scarf: H&M + Bracelet: Aldo Accessories

Bricks & Scones

403 N. Larchmont Blvd

Los Angeles, CA 90004

323.463.0811

The Positive Thinker Sees The Invisible, Feels The Intangible, And Achieves The Impossible.

This weekend, my family and I made a brief trip to Las Vegas to pick up my Aunt Susan's ashes. My mother is leaving for Africa this week and plans to disperse them there. Every time I think of Susan I am reminded of how precious life is, and how blessed I am just to be alive. No matter what is going on in your life, give God the glory every morning when you wake, because that is the biggest blessing of all.

A butterfly landed on my mini me's hand, so I snapped a few pics before it flew off!

I spent the latter part of my Sunday night re-organizing my apt and cleaning shop. I finally got around to potting some cool plants I bought from the farmer's market a couple of weeks ago. Plants emit a source of positive energy, so it is good to put them in areas around the home where you need it most. In my case, its my workstation, as it is here that I find it the hardest to concentrate. The energy that you create around your workspace greatly affects the vibrations of the work you put out. The more positive the energy, the higher the vibration; which allows you to lift others through your work as well.

If you are having mental roadblocks, issues concentrating, or having a hard time blocking out "real-life" in order to tap into your creative side; take some time to reorganize your workstation. Put positive affirmations on a poster board in front of you, put some plants around your desk, pray/meditate and ask for a "clear and open" mind before you begin to work; you will be amazed at the big difference these small changes can make!

I believe this entire outfit [minus the shoes] was well under $5 - I normally strive to find outfits that are $10 and under, as I am not really into spending 1/2 of my income on dispensable's like clothing [although I will splurge from time to time]. I also like the fact that thrifting allows me to express myself with clothing that is comparable to "one of a kind" pieces. I purchased everything from an Estate Sale with the exception of the oversized clutch that was given to me by my Great Grandmother, and the shoes which I purchased at Saks Fifth Ave.

My hair in these pics is styled courtesy of a week-old twistout! The wind got a hold of it and blew it to smithereens. I love the Donna Marie Lock & Twist Pudding, but I don't really care for the amount of shrinkage [especially in the back of my head]. I think I will try a dry twistout with this stuff to see how it works out. Of course I will keep you all posted.

Wearing:
Shirt: Vintage
Shorts: Vintage
Oversized Clutch: Great Grandmother's
Belt: Vintage
Double Platform's: Fendi

The Monologue - You May Say That I'm A Dreamer; But I'm Not The Only One

Finally designed and printed my business cards!

It's amazing that when you make up your mind about something, the universe conspires to give you everything you need, thus putting things in perfect rhythm. Yesterday my girls Lo [half of His Hers Chicago], Alma & Aljaira [half of the design team from NINETEEN TWENTYNINE] decided to have a meeting of the minds on the town. The backdrop: Downtown Los Angeles Artwalk. The purpose: To continue to motivate, inspire, and support each other in our business endeavors. We made a pact last night that we are on a 180 day mission that will hopefully change the course of our lives, and standing in front of Pete's Cafe on the corner of 4th and Main, we had what some would call our "defining moment". I feel like we are all kindred spirits who linked together at the perfect time. No ego's, no drama, all love.

If you ever happen to fall into the Los Angeles area on the second Thursday of the month, I recommend you checkout the Artwalk! The galleries are open, the people are friendly, the local bars have specials; and for one day out of the month, I actually feel safe traipsing down the streets of Downtown L.A after dark.

Standing out front of the "dis-played" exhibit. 

One of my favorite pieces from the showing

Lo in front of the exhibit!

 Can't believe I only have ONE pic of Aljaira & Alma! Next time..

James [of Haus of Price] & I, his vintage collection was overflowing with colors & patterns that popped; a man after my own heart!

Lo x2 + James

Part of the massive amount of vint clothing up for grabs!

People watching...

 Mixed Media works by Dave Lovejoy, the self professed "thingmaker"

Some of my favorite pieces from Indie Designer Mele Marchesseault of MixedHearts.com

A girl can never have too many statement pieces; and Yanique from Confection Jewels has definitely mastered the art of creating uber chic hardware for your digits. 

Wearing: Button Down: Thrifted - Shorts: Thrifted - Belt: Thrifted - Purse: Thrifted - Earings: Thrifted - Bow Tie: Pulled from Lo's closet! - Tights: H&M - Boots: Jeffrey Campbell - Lipstick: Ruby Woo by MAC

More Jewelry!

Human rights, and dignity for all could be possible if everyone stood together in love. Maybe one day I can help be part of that movement!